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18 May 2012
2 Comments

Paint It Black

“I see a red door and I want it painted black
No colors anymore I want them to turn black
I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head until my darkness goes” [1]

Judging by the outcry over the Indianapolis Motor Speedway’s decision to paint an advertisement in the Turn One infield grass, you would think the marketers at IMS had just sold naming rights to the Pagoda.  Oh, wait.  They did that a few years ago with Bomdardier, didn’t they?  People are acting like they put a sponsor on the Borg-Warner Trophy.  Wait a minute.  Sorry.  Well, you would think they partnered with Coca-Cola to be the sole supplier of soft drinks at the track.  What?  Really?  Well then, you would think they entered into a deal with Cholula Hot Sauce …Tag Heuer…Shell V-Power…Apex Brasil…Peak Performance…Miller Lite…IZOD.  Oh, they DID enter into marketing agreements with all of these companies?  What do you know, IMS is acting like it is a business trying to make money.

The traditionalists want nothing to change.  They want the new ad painted in Turn One painted black, like the Rolling Stones lyrics suggest.  They can’t fathom ads on the walls.  Really?  You have a problem with money?  Maybe a short history lesson is in order.  If you want tradition, look no further than Indianapolis Motor Speedway founder Carl Fisher.  To drum up business for his car dealership, he attached a car to a balloon and had it fly across Indianapolis.  THAT’S a promotion, and promotion is why he built the track.  He wanted to sell cars and headlights.  He understood that you had to advertise to make money.  And I guarantee if painting the infield was worth a dollar to him, then the infield would have been painted.

After Tony Hulman bought the track, the cash cow that was IMS was only milked once a year.  For years the Hulman family did not own a racing series, did not build a road course, did not pay F1 a sanctioning fee, did not host NASCAR, did not host MotoGP, and did not own a Pete Dye golf course.  They became rich selling Clabber Girl Baking Powder and hosting the 500 in the month of May.  But when the Hulman-George family did do all of those things, they spent a substantial amount of money, possibly enough money to cause a restructuring of the board of directors.   Suddenly, making money, or at least not bleeding money, became VERY important.

Things changed at Indy when making money became the primary objective.  The marketing types suddenly were looking for ways to increase revenue.  If you wanted to produce the ring for the winner, you had to do more than just make the ring: you had to pay for the privilege.  That’s the way they do it in the real world.  The Pagoda, the video boards, the upgrades to seating, the yellow shirts, and the maintenance to the facility are costs that continue to increase.  A business has to make money; people have to get paid.  If a few ads keep my ticket prices down and the sponsorship up, then I’ll be happy.

And the last time I looked at the cars, they had sponsors on the side.  What’s the difference?  I hear no one bemoaning the sanctity and tradition of the car. You don’t expect the cars to all be painted black, do you?

“I see a line of cars and they’re all painted black
With flowers and my love both never to come back
I see people turn their heads and quickly look away
Like a new born baby it just happens ev’ry day”

Some fans consider the Speedway to be a somber matron dressed in subdued colors.  How many somber matrons do you know who get any attention?  Matrons today are ditching their drab and dreary attire.  You stay young and vital by acting that way.  So let the old girl put on some leopard print pants and high heels.  I say strut your stuff, Indy.  You’re only as young as you feel.  If your make-up includes a few ads, so be it.  We are all walking billboards for designer clothing companies, anyway; I proudly sport my IZOD logos.

The tradition of Indy is alive in its history, pageantry, and tradition.  And the tradition includes having a viable family business that stays in the family.  I don’t begrudge the Speedway creating a little more cash flow.  Consider the possibility of the Indianapolis Motor Speedway being sold to some faceless multinational corporation because of financial issues.  Now that’s a picture that is truly painted black.

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1.  Like the Rolling Stones?  Here’s the song “Paint It Black” along with the lyrics.  I love the intro. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Egt1Hq4wpE

Posted in Opinions and tagged , , , ,
17 May 2012
1 Comment

Honda: Checkered Past to Checkered Flag

(Editor’s Note: Steve Wittich, today’s guest blogger, is one canny Canuck.  New Track Record was lucky enough to get him to write about some real history instead of the semi-lucid ramblings usually found here.  We hope he will follow this up with another post next Thursday.  You can find a daily dose of racing opinions from Steve on Twitter @stevewittich.)

I’d like to thank Mark for this opportunity to guest blog on NewTrackRecord.  I had a grand plan to explain the IndyCar engine wars of the past and dovetail that into explaining why engines are leased instead of purchased.  I decided that might be a little deep for my first blog attempt, so I have instead decided to focus on a study in perseverance for one of IndyCar’s current engine manufacturers.

Honda’s mid-80’s foray into IndyCar racing was a disaster.  Their “badging” of the Judd AV lasted only one year.  Fast forward to the mid-90’s, 1994 to be exact, and this commercial:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=osNyXkMWnSE

This time instead of partnering with a third-party engine manufacturer, Honda took matters into their own hands and formed Honda Performance Development.  They chose to partner with Rahal-Hogan Racing with drivers Bobby Rahal and Mike Groff.  As far as the overall season went, it wasn’t a total disaster.  Bobby Rahal finished 10th in points and Mike Groff finished 20th in points. The results were extremely inconsistent with mechanical failures being quite common. .

But remember that the tag-line in the above commercial was “See ya at Indy”.  From the beginning Honda has made it quite clear that winning Indy was their goal.  Unfortunately for Honda the month of May didn’t quite go as planned.  Rahal and Groff were unable to get their Honda powered Lola’s up to speed and ended up leasing two Ilmor powered Penske PC22s from Roger Penske.  Both easily qualified for the field.  Groff’s day ended early when he and Dominic Dobson made contact, and Rahal was able to ride his rented mule to a third place finish.

One might think that after those two missteps, Honda would reconsider their involvement in IndyCar racing.  They doubled down and pressed on, and in 1995 they joined forces with Tasman Motorsports.  Tasman fielded one full-time car for Indy Lights standout Andre Ribiero as well as a part-time car for Canadian Scott Goodyear.

The year started off slowly for Tasman and Ribiero with three DNF’s in the first three races, but their luck started to turn around at Nazareth.  Giving us a hint of Honda’s new found power was a sixth place start and 11th place finish.  It was now on to Indy where Goodyear would drive a second Tasman car.  Goodyear’s surprising outside front row starting position was overshadowed by the failure of Team Penske to qualify for the race.

The Honda’s race day horsepower was evident as soon as the green flag dropped when Goodyear swept to the lead and led the race for 42 laps.  Unfortunately while leading during a late restart, Goodyear passed the pace car, and his refusal to acknowledge the black flag meant he finished in 17th place.  Honda came “that” close to achieving their goal in only their second try.  I’m not sure anybody knew at that point that it would be almost two decades before they got another shot.

The rest of the year for Tasman and Ribiero was a mixed bag of results as they generally qualified in the top 10 but due to mechanical issues and incidents failed to finish many races.  They did have one VERY bright spot as Ribiero put his Reynard Honda on the pole at New Hampshire and proceeded to run away with the race.

The following season (1996) saw Honda greatly expand their effort to include seven full-time cars including Chip Gannasi Racing.  Honda won all but three races that season and won their first series championship with Ganassi’s Jimmy Vasser.

This started an impressive string of six straight CART championships including two by Alex Zanardi, two by Gil de Ferran and one by Juan Pablo Montoya.

In 2002 Honda announced that they had unfinished business at the Indy 500 and would begin supplying engines to IRL teams in 2003.  They had some success in 2003 with wins by Tony Kanaan and Bryan Herta, but they would have to wait until 2004 to finally taste victory at Indianapolis.

Buddy Rice came out on top at the 2004 Indianapolis 500 giving Honda victory exactly two decades after they went home with their tail between their legs.  It was a dominating performance by Honda that saw them take home the first seven spots in the race.  That win began an era of Honda domination, and they have won the last seven Indianapolis 500’s and drove their competition from the series

Honda came to dominate IndyCar, but I’d like to remind people not to forget their inauspicious start and applaud them for the perseverance and dedication that it took to overcome that.

Whether Honda can make it eight Indianapolis 500 victories in a row is a big question mark.  Engine competition has brought some new story lines to IndyCar and watching Chevrolet try to wrestle control of the Indianapolis 500 away from Honda is definitely the headliner.

Posted in History and tagged , , , ,
15 May 2012
1 Comment

Indy Tenderloin Tour – The Red Key Tavern

I am an unabashed lover of kitsch. [1]  Tacky?  I love it.  Over-the-top odd?  I’m there.  That is why I absolutely love the Red Key Tavern at 5170 N. College Ave. in Indy.  It suits me.  The term “eclectic” [2] comes to mind when you walk in the door.  It is a neighborhood tavern in every sense of the word.  The regulars all know each other.  You can leave your money on the bar when you hit the head.  The jukebox has Frank Sinatra, Benny Goodman, and Bing Crosby on it.  How cool is that?

The bar was owned by Russ Settle, a WWII bomber crewman, who passed away in 2010.  You MUST read his obituary in the Indy alternative paper NUVO, as written by one of his former employees. [3]  It explains everything from a much more personal perspective.  I know my limitations; I can’t tell his story like Nora Spitznogle can.  And it’s his story that makes the bar.  He had rules you had to follow and expectations you had to meet.  Everything in the bar, from the songs on the jukebox to the model planes hanging from the ceiling, defined him.  The Dan Wakefield novel Going All the Way, had scenes set here.  The movie of the same name starring Ben Affleck had scenes filmed here.  If “keeping it real” is just a phrase to you, don’t stop.  If you want a real experience – and a great breaded tenderloin – this place is a “must see.”

How about that tenderloin?  Our friendly bartender Robin told us the meat is pounded and breaded on site.  The breading is nothing fancy.  It’s just a commercial product.  But that’s OK.  The magic is in how this baby is cooked.  Most places deep fry their breaded tenderloins, but the Redkey has no deep fryer.  What they have is a 60-year-old flat-top grill.  The breading is light because they cook your breaded beauty on this grill with just a splash of oil.  And pause for a moment to consider the flavor that a flat-top grill has burned into it over 60 years.  That’s called seasoning.  Get the picture?  This is a great sandwich because of how it’s cooked.  Add a couple of locally brewed Sun King Cream Ales and you have a great meal.

Russ Settle had his rules.  Here are my rules for visiting the Red Key Tavern

  • Get there early if you want a tenderloin.  They run out.
  • Order the potato salad.  Again, they run out.
  • If the tenderloins are gone (you have been warned), then get a hamburger.  They are cooked on the same seasoned grill.
  • They have no beer on tap.  They do, however, carry locally brewed products.  I suggest the Sun King Cream Ale or the Sun King Wee Mac.
  • Play the jukebox.  Try something you have never heard before.
  • Behave yourself.  Follow the rules.
  • BRING CASH!  The Red Key does not take plastic.  Old school, baby.  This is the kind of place you might expect to see Blue from the movie Old School. [4]
  • Enjoy this place.  Bars like this are vanishing pieces of Americana.

I have to give the Red Key Tavern a checkered flag, not only for the tenderloin, but for the whole experience.

Ratings:
Checkered Flag: It’s a winner.  Picture should be on the Pork-Warner Trophy.
Green Flag: It’s a go.  Solid competitor with a chance to be a winner.
Yellow Flag:  Warning.  Something is not copacetic.
Black Flag:  Get this pig off the track.

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1.  Here’s a good primer on “kitsch.”  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kitsch

2.  For the vocabulary impaired, “eclectic” is defined by the New Oxford American Dictionary as “deriving ideas, style, or taste from a broad and diverse range of sources: her musical tastes are eclectic.”  And yes, I am a supercilious prick for using the term “eclectic” and for assuming that the reader does not know the definition.

3.  Here’s the NUVO obit.  http://www.nuvo.net/FoodDrinkBlog/archives/2010/04/05/red-key-taverns-russ-settle-died-sunday

4.  Here’s Will Ferrell’s tribute to Blue from the movie Old School.    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vnywlzr7Y1o

Posted in Indy Tenderloin Tour and tagged , , , ,
14 May 2012
3 Comments

Ten Worthless Opinions – Indy Social Media Garage Edition

Through some legerdemain, hocus-pocus, super moon cosmic connection, or dumb luck,  I have been selected to be a blogger in the IMS Social Media Garage.  I’m pretty sure it was a combination of more qualified writers being unable to participate and a deadline where the vivacious Cassie Conklin, one of the primary SMG mechanics, simply said, “We have one more spot to fill.  Who’s next on the list?”  However it happened, I’m just happy to park New Track Record in the garage for the month of May.  I do have a few WO’s (worthless opinions) regarding the Social Media Garage and the first weekend of practice.

1.  Bloggers are normally happy in the shadows.  I mean, take a look at our pictures on the SMG web page.  Yikes.  Would you call us edgy, classy, or cool looking?  How about old, fat, or geeky then?  By and large, bloggers live on hope. We hope someone will read our opinions or laugh at our jokes.  We hope that people will follow us on Twitter or comment on our stuff.  And we hope for the blogger bonanza: money, swag, or credentials.  In the case of the Social Media Garage…Yahtzee!  We have been HOOKED UP.  We are still doing it for free, and I haven’t seen any shirts or hats yet, but we scored credentials for the month of May.  Normally, bloggers are told they can come in the back door and not to touch anything.  The SMG people said come on in, and you can even sit on the furniture.  It’s like the Jimmy Buffett song “Gypsies in the Palace.” [1]  We are just taking advantage of the situation while we can.  And I have to tell you, my family and friends now think I am an insufferable ass.  Or as Steve Wittich (@stevewittich) said, “You mean more of an insufferable ass.”  Well, yes.

2.  I have always contended that the Indianapolis Motor Speedway is really just a large Mom and Pop business.  It’s family run, and the people you come in contact with in the ticket office, credentials office, the gift shop, and the museum are invariably friendly and helpful.  Maybe it’s the business culture or Hoosier hospitality, but IMS people are just nice.  After getting word that I was one of the chosen/lucky bloggers, I was instructed to head to the corner of 16th and Georgetown to pick up my credentials.  I was hoping for Bronze Badge access, but was given a parking pass, a pass for race day pit/garage/grid access, and a Silver Badge.  Since I previously purchased a Bronze Badge, there was some paperwork/computer issues to work through.  Jennifer, one of the supervisors, was professional, pleasant, and helpful.  I might add that the credentials office runs a tight ship.  I would guess that not too many things fall through the cracks in there.  To add to the festivities, Eric Hall (@Erock_in_Indy), one of the other SMG bloggers, was in the office with the same problem as I.  We both felt like interlopers, waiting for someone to say, “Just a minute, you two.  There’s been some mistake.”  But we walked out clutching our badges and passes like kids gripping bags of candy on Halloween evening.

3.  The sidewalk and lawn in front of the IMS office on 16th and Georgetown is a great place to see the various team personnel pick up their credentials.  And the best part is they have to stand in line in the credentials office just like everybody else.  I love the great equalizers in our society.

4.  As Eric and I left the IMS offices, a woman who was picking up credentials at the window between us stopped to ask what was going on in there.  She was friendly (Hoosier hospitality once again) and interested in our story.  She introduced herself as Joan Parsons Voyles and very quietly, but with great pride, said that her father was a former 500 winner.  Her father was Johnnie Parsons, the 1950 champion. [2]  Stories are everywhere at Indy.

5.  If you see Eric at the SMG this year, be sure to ask him who else we met in front of the IMS offices.  And ask him where he got his picture that you see on the SMG webpage.  It only looks like a mug shot.

6.  Need another place to go to see the IndyCar personnel?  Get to Charlie Brown’s Pancake and Steak House on Main St. in Speedway early on any given practice morning.  Good food and good people watching.

7.  Opening Day at the track is just cool.  The auto show behind the Pagoda this year was superb.  Just assume the cars were beyond description.  Even better was watching the blazer wearing judges making their choices.  They talked, walked, dressed, and smelled like money.  My favorite was the judge wearing a “Gulfstream” logo cap.  Does he think we can’t tell he’s already rich?  And I can mock him all I want because I absolutely know he does not read my blog.  Small victory, I guess.

8.  Planning to buy your beer at the track?  The Foster’s Oil Can [3] holds 25.4 oz. of beer.  At $7.00 a beer that’s only $3.50 for 12 oz.  I dare you to find a better deal at any major sporting event.  At New Track Record, we believe in value.

9.  If you are a regular at the track and do not have a Bronze Badge, you are making a mistake.  Walking through the garage is flat-out fun.  The drivers are approachable, and you are up close to the action.  (Thanks to Bryan Clauson, a Noblesville boy like myself, for taking time to talk to my son and I on Saturday.  He’s genuine, and that is some of my highest praise.)  Plus, having a badge is great just because you can feel special.  And who doesn’t like that?  It’s human nature.  And for $100, you can feel special, too.  Also, I found out that badge envy exists.  Twice, people saw my badge, looked me up and down, and said, “Silver?”  I smiled.  If I only had a hat that said “Gulfstream” on it.

10.  Oh.  And there were some cars on the track, and they went kind of fast.

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1.  Here is a live version of “Gypsies in the Palace.”  I hope I don’t get a cease and desist order.  I hear JB is harsh. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xBpG-GEZLCE&feature=related

2.  Here’s a link to Johnnie Parson’s Wikipedia page with an interesting story about the trophy.  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Johnnie_Parsons

3.  And of course, a link to Foster’s beer.  Enjoy.  http://www.fostersbeer.com/ 

Posted in 10 Worthless Opinions and tagged , , , , ,
11 May 2012
4 Comments

What I miss about the Indy 500

Growing older is a mixed bag.  The down side is the inevitable nature of this whole mortality thing.  On the other hand, you accumulate so many wonderful memories.  The down side of that, of course, is the memory loss that comes with aging.  So many memories, so few brain cells.  So why am I sounding such a maudlin note?  The answer is simple: I haven’t lost all my memories of the Indy 500, and it’s an exercise in nostalgia to remember how it used to be.  Here’s my list.

  • I miss the media coverage.  The 500 used to dominate the news cycle in Indianapolis.  From the beginning of May until the awards banquet, both Indy papers, the Star and the News, were filled with all sorts of racing, social, and human interest stories about the 500.  People around the world would subscribe to one or both of the papers.  Indy always began when the papers reported that Larry Bisceglia had arrived to be first in line at IMS.  You expected to read multiple articles every day.  Now you hope you see something.
  • I miss the night before the 500.  Going to 16th Street the night before the race was an EVENT.  You planned for it.  If you were a denizen of the infield, you had to be somewhere near the track the night before so you could get in line on 16th Street to get in the gates.  Good parking places were at a premium both outside the track the night before the race and inside the track the day of the race.  You plotted, planned, faked, and finally pulled into line.  More than once a car pulled out of a parking spot to get in line and was waved on down the street by the police.  It was a contest.  And the party was HUGE.  It was a place to grow up a little each year.  Of course I was relatively unsupervised from the time I was ten, so I learned a lot at an early age.  But that knowledge is worthless now.  The number of people trying to park inside the track has grown smaller because most of the infield parking has disappeared.  I think it’s one of those law of diminishing returns kind of thing.
  • I miss the community that was the infield.  It had an organic vitality that no longer exists.  Check the photos at IndyStar.com to see what the Snake Pit was like in the 70’s. It was the high water mark.  The new third turn dynamic pales in comparison.  That’s not to say the past was all sweetness and light.  It wasn’t.  It was drunk, dirty, and dangerous.  The new corporate Snake Pit is like a ride at Disney World: a lot of fun but still an imitation of the real thing.
  • I miss the characters.  Name one current owner like Andy Granatelli.  You can’t.  Name a driver like A.J. Foyt, Mario Andretti, Lloyd Ruby, Jim Hurtubise, or Jimmy Clark.  They were bigger than life and far from the politically correct drivers of today.  And that’s not an indictment of today’s drivers.  It’s a comment on the power of money and sponsorship.  Today’s drivers are a product of the business of racing.  I think there’s hope with James Hinchcliffe and Josef Newgarden, though.  I hope the corporate suits let them be themselves.
  • I miss “Thirty Days in May.”  The track used to open on May 1st and teams practiced every day until the second week of qualifications was over.  I understand that economics dictated the shortening of the month.  Just because it was the right decision doesn’t mean I have to like it.  It was news to be the first car and driver on the track each year.  There was action every day.  Engines weren’t leased, and there were no mileage limits.  You could run all day, every day if you wanted.  As Eric Hall at anotherindycarblog.com noted,  Happy Hour just isn’t the same, either.  If you arrived at  the track at 5:00 PM, you were assured of seeing SPEED.  Sadly, those days are over.  The two weekends of qualifying were meaningful because the 500 actually was “The Greatest Spectacle in Racing.”  The drivers acted like making the race was the most important moment in their lives because it was.  Quite simply, the whole month of May was the most important and publicized racing time of the year.
  • I miss the crowds.  If the race is the largest one day sporting event in the world, the first day of qualifications might have been the second largest.  Records were broken and reputations were made.  It was its own race.  The crowds on race day are gone now, too.  A ducat to the race used to be gold.  Every seat was sold.  Now the unsold seats show up on TV.  With the lack of parking inside the track, the general admission crowd is also down, and the crowds that used to sit in all four turns and the backstretch are squeezed into the backstretch and the third turn.  And very quietly, IMS is planning on downsizing the NE Vista and at least one other stand.  If these stands were full, or had a hope of being full, IMS would not be tearing part of them down.  The crowd is smaller, and the larger crowd is never coming back.
  • I miss the icons of Indy.  And I know I’m going to miss more of them.  This track just celebrated its centennial, and if those years have taught us anything, it’s that everyone and everything has an arc.  The track, the race, and the drivers all change, yet remain constant in so many ways.  This year we will see a video of Jim Nabors singing “Back Home Again in Indiana.”  One day a new voice will sing that song.  Donald Davidson will continue to amaze us with his encyclopedic knowledge of all things Indy.  Someday there will be a new historian.  Dan Wheldon will not share his pure joy of racing with us again, yet new drivers will always come to 16th and Georgetown to be part of this fabulous tradition.  The voice of Tom Carnegie, whose signature PA call is the title of this blog, will never be heard again.  These arcs are passing or passed.  I do, and will, miss them all.

My father Horace Wilkinson was born May 30, 1913.  Race day.  He loved the 500.  My granddaughter Isabella Wilkinson was born May 29, 2011.  Race day.  I hope my father’s, my son’s, and my love of this event gets passed on to her.  I hope that someday she passes her love of this great tradition on to her children and grandchildren.  Maybe she will tell stories of what she misses most about the race.  Maybe one of those stories will be about me. [1]

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1.  I thought long and hard about what song to connect to this moment.  What song says “remember me” in a moving fashion?  I want to thank Tony Johns at PopOffValve.com for mentioning the band Neutral Milk Hotel in a “Paddock Pulse” comment about my blog .  I checked out the band and found the song “In the Aeroplane Over the Sea” sung by Jeff Mangum.  He wrote this song about Anne Frank after visiting Amsterdam.  Listen to the lyrics and think not only of Dan Wheldon, but of all those we miss in our lives.  Never forget that we race on Memorial Day and what that means. The lyrics expand below the video.   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tZuwRORuEyw

Posted in Opinions and tagged , , , ,
08 May 2012

Indy Tenderloin Tour – The Mug-n-Bun

(Third in a series of five appearing every Tuesday through May 22, 2012)

What could be better on warm spring evening than curb service at an iconic drive-in?  Nothing!  If only that was our evening at Mug-n-Bun, 5211 West 10th St. in Speedway.  It was cool and rainy, but we persevered and ordered our breaded tenderloins, onion rings, french fries, and frosty mugs of root beer.  Here is the view out of my window:

Even in the rain, that looks GOOD.  And the rings, fries and root beer were good.  Which brings us to the tenderloin.  Our lovely and rain-soaked car hop Heather told me that the breaded tenderloins were really…fritters.  It is acceptable to gasp.  The meaty mecca of Robin Miller fame serves frozen fritters. All of you pork pros out there know that a truly good breaded tenderloin is hand-pounded and hand-breaded, never frozen.  I was so saddened that I needed another root beer.

This is not to say that the visit was disappointing.  The ambiance of a Speedway landmark combined with curb service and home-made root beer almost negated the fritter…but not quite.  This is, after all, the Indy Tenderloin Tour.  My advice: go.  If the frozen fritter leaves you cold, order a foot-long coney.  Be sure to order your root beer in the mug to drink there, and when you leave order a root beer to go in the large plastic souvenir cup.  If you don’t like the in-car experience, you can always sit at a picnic table.  It’s a drive-in.  Just have fun.

My rating: A Checkered Flag for the ambiance and root beer and Green Flag/Yellow Flag for the fritter.

Ratings:

Checkered Flag: It’s a winner.  Picture should be on the Pork-Warner Trophy.
Green Flag: It’s a go.  Solid competitor with a chance to be a winner.
Yellow Flag:  Warning.  Something is not copacetic.
Black Flag:  Get this pig off the track.

Posted in Indy Tenderloin Tour and tagged , , , | Leave a comment
07 May 2012
3 Comments

Ten Worthless Opinions – The Shawshank Redemption Edition

What better way to preface my WO’s (worthless opinions) than with quotes from one of those movies you always have to stop and watch when you are flipping through the channels.  Here’s this week’s “Ten Worthless Opinions – The Shawshank Redemption Edition”  Let’s see what Red and Andy have to say about IndyCar racing.

1.  “I find I’m so excited, I can barely sit still or hold a thought in my head. I think it’s the excitement only a free man can feel, a free man at the start of a long journey whose conclusion is uncertain. I hope I can make it across the border. I hope to see my friend and shake his hand. I hope the Pacific is as blue as it has been in my dreams. I hope.” 

This is Red on his way to meet Andy in Mexico.  If you substitute “Indy” for “Pacific,” you have how it feels to live in central Indiana in May.  For an Indy 500 fan, nothing compares.  You just can’t wait for the track to open.  Of course, if you are regular reader, you know I can’t keep a thought in my head any other time of the year, either.  If you are an IndyCar fan, the last two words sum everything up.

2.  “Andy crawled to freedom through five hundred yards of shit smelling foulness I can’t even imagine, or maybe I just don’t want to. Five hundred yards… that’s the length of five football fields, just shy of half a mile.”  

This is Red talking about Andy’s escape.  Have you ever seen the campground in the Coke Lot?  Have you ever walked down Georgetown the night before the race?  Have you ever been in the third turn infield at Indy?  Were you ever in the real Snake Pit in first turn?  Yep, this is Indy.

3.  “I believe in two things: discipline and the Bible. Here you’ll receive both. Put your trust in the Lord; your ass belongs to me. Welcome to Shawshank.”  

Warden Norton said this to the new prisoners.  Taking away the fact that Norton was completely corrupt, isn’t this what Beaux Barfield has been telling the drivers?  Substitute “rule book” for “Bible” and “IndyCar” for “Shawshank,” and I think you’ve got it.

4.  “I  must admit I didn’t think much of Andy first time I laid eyes on him; looked like a stiff breeze would blow him over. That was my first impression of the man.” 

This comment by Red seems to be how so many people viewed Randy Bernard when he was first hired.  And yes, I’m looking at you Track Forum and Miller’s Mailbag.  Randy’s got some sand.  He is handling the stiff breezes, and the tornadoes, quite well.

5.  “What is your malfunction, you fat barrel of monkey spunk?”

Captain Hadley said this.  I don’t know if A.J. Foyt ever uttered these words to anyone, but he should have.  I can hear that Texas twang now.  It makes me smile just to think about it.

6.  “Let me tell you something my friend. Hope is a dangerous thing. Hope can drive a man insane.”

Red’s comment sums up exactly how I feel about the present and future of IndyCar.  I continue to hope, but things like the continuing Lotus saga and the Michael Shank Racing issues keep popping up.  Insane?  Not yet, but give me time.

7.  “I have no idea to this day what those two Italian ladies were singing about. Truth is, I don’t want to know. Some things are best left unsaid. I’d like to think they were singing about something so beautiful, it can’t be expressed in words, and makes your heart ache because of it. I tell you, those voices soared higher and farther than anybody in a gray place dares to dream. It was like some beautiful bird flapped into our drab little cage and made those walls dissolve away, and for the briefest of moments, every last man in Shawshank felt free.” 

Red’s response to Andy playing opera on the prison PA defines the power of music.  At the 500, you don’t have to have a music degree to understand “On the Banks of the Wabash Far Away,” “Back Home Again in Indiana,” “Taps,” or the music of the engines on the first lap.  Those songs and sounds may not make us feel free like they did Red, but they certainly make us feel. [1]

8.  “Bad luck, I guess. It floats around. It’s got to land on somebody. It was my turn, that’s all. I was in the path of the tornado. I just didn’t expect the storm would last as long as it has.” 

Andy Dufresne talking here.  This could be either Marco Andretti, Graham Rahal, or Dario Franchitti being interviewed after a shunt when there is no one else to blame.  It must be fate, since it can’t be their driving.

9.  “Get busy living, or get busy dying.”  

This is Red again, and I think he makes a valid point about the future of IndyCar.  As fans, we can embrace the past, but we have to stop living in it.  Other than Indy, the series needs to make a new history with new drivers, new cars, and new motors.  This series needs vitality, and that is found in new things.  If IndyCar continues to live in the past, then the series will continue its descent out of the public’s eye.  Get busy, Indycar.

10.  “Sometimes it makes me sad, though… Andy being gone. I have to remind myself that some birds aren’t meant to be caged. Their feathers are just too bright. And when they fly away, the part of you that knows it was a sin to lock them up DOES rejoice. But still, the place you live in is that much more drab and empty that they’re gone. I guess I just miss my friend.” 

Red describing Andy being gone is how I feel every other month of the year.  May is magical for an Indy 500 fan.  The race is on the horizon, and every day the excitement builds.   The only thing keeping depression from setting in the day after the race is knowing the next race on the schedule is coming up.  The checkered flags and banners on the house are carefully folded and stored for another year.  Life is much more drab and empty.  I miss my friend the 500.

I’m glad Red and Andy took the time to share their thoughts on IndyCar racing with us.  I am sure they would both understand when I say that the night before the 500 is “the longest night of my life.”

________________________________________

1.  Here’s Straight No Chaser, founded at Indiana University, singing “Back Home Again in Indiana.”  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PZ8A7Q-SVHI

Posted in 10 Worthless Opinions and tagged , , ,
01 May 2012

Indy Tenderloin Tour: Binkley’s

(Second in a series of five appearing every Tuesday through May 22, 2010)

This installment of our “Indy Tenderloin Tour” finds us in Broad Ripple, one of Indy’s trendy districts.  If you want to party with the young people and crawl a few pubs, this is the place.  College Avenue is a north-south street that takes you by the Italian favorites Iaria’s and the Milano Inn downtown, past Sun King Brewery, and eventually becomes a wide path leading you to party town, aka Broad Ripple.  As you cruise past the corner of College and Kessler you will see Binkley’s Kitchen and Bar at 5902 N. College Avenue.

Binkley’s took its name from the drugstore that sat on the corner from 1928 until the early 70’s.  You have to like a place that gives a shout out to history.  During the winter you can expect big crowds on the nights Butler [1] plays a home basketball game.

We sat on the patio and were assisted by the lovely and vivacious Deborah.  One recommendation is to order an Indiana brewed beer.  On tap at our visit were beers from Sun King, Three Floyds, Flat 12, and Triton. [2]  You cannot go wrong with any of these breweries.  Remember: drink locally, race globally.

As expected, we ordered breaded tenderloins.  The lovely and vivacious Deborah (bartenders and servers LOVE to be called lovely and vivacious) informed us that the tenderloins at Binkley’s were cut and pounded on site.  The meat is dredged in white flour, fine corn meal, and spices.  The buns are delivered five times a week from Chicago.  Here’s what graced our table:

Tenderloins tread a thin line sometimes.  If they are pounded too thin, it’s all breading without substance.  If they are not pounded enough, the meat is not completely cooked.  The tenderloins at Binkley’s are thick enough to be meaty, yet thin enough to be cooked thoroughly.  Yahtzee!  The buns were toasty and firm and held up well.  Bun sustainability is vital for a great breaded tenderloin.  These babies sustain!  As always, my condiments of choice were mayonnaise and onions.

I have to give this breaded baby a Checkered Flag.  It’s worth the trip to Broad Ripple.

Ratings:
Checkered Flag: It’s a winner.  Picture should be on the Pork-Warner Trophy.
Green Flag: It’s a go.  Solid competitor with a chance to be a winner.
Yellow Flag:  Warning.  Something is not copacetic.
Black Flag:  Get this pig off the track.

_______________________

1.  Here’s a link to the ESPN Sports Science segment that analyzed Gordon Hayward’s final shot versus Duke in the 2010 NCAA championship game.  If this shot had gone in, Butler would have been the 2010 NCAA champion.  Hoosier Hysteria, baby! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TQs-d_9iJ14&feature=related

2.  What does everyone need?  Links to great Indiana breweries.  Enjoy!

Posted in Indy Tenderloin Tour and tagged , , , | Leave a comment
29 Apr 2012
1 Comment

New Track Record’s Ten Worthless Opinions – Sao Paulo Indy 300

What comes to mind when you think of Brazil?  Carnival?  Samba?  Nude beaches?  Crime?  I assume your answer is “yes” to all of those.  Another answer is auto racing.  Brazilians love fast cars.  It’s quicker to get to the nude beaches that way.  Or away from kidnappers.  But I jest.  I have formulated some totally worthless opinions about this week’s race in Brazil.

1.  How can you not love Bitchin’ Bob Jenkins.  For all of his mistakes ( confusing Brazil with Canada TWICE, starting the broadcast by misstating how long until the start,  miscounting the number of Brazilians in the race, and his usual assortment of using the wrong name for people), he is totally self-aware.  He knows he makes the mistakes and takes the ribbing of his booth cohorts with grace and good humor.  I had the opportunity to do TV color commentary for the Indiana state high school softball championships, and I can tell you it is the hardest, most humbling thing I have ever done.  Bob is the guy in the booth that must keep the focus on the race while watching a foreign broadcast from a studio in America.  I liked that he disclaimed the fact a number of times.  Even as I criticize, I realize we are lucky to have a guy like Bob Jenkins in the booth.  He’s sincere and honest, and that goes a long way with me.

2.  Does anyone else have a love-hate relationship with IndyCar 36?  I love that fact that NBC Sports is publicizing the drivers, but find myself being put to sleep by the narrative.  In my WO (worthless opinion), I would like to see more controversy and conflict.  The drivers are so politically aware.  We need some A.J. injected into the story.  Still, the meaning of Long Beach to Ryan Hunter-Reay and his wife was touching.  Maybe I’m not the demographic they are looking to entertain.

3.  Does anyone else find double file restarts exciting when they are done correctly?  True, the tight first turn in Brazil led to some, as Twitter aptly suggested, monkey/football romance.  But aside from that, I find myself leaning forward on restarts.  That’s good, right?  This has been a positive change.

4.  Speaking of positive changes, Beaux Barfield has been one.  After each accident, we were informed of an investigation and were informed (as well as TV, Brazil, Bob Jenkins, and technology allowed) of the outcome.  The rules seem clear to the drivers and the penalties seem fair and impartially enforced.  Unless you’re Sarah Fisher at Long Beach.  Speaking of which, the prerace had a moment of racing comedy as Kevin Lee questioned Dario Franchitti and referenced his contact with Josef Newgarden in Long Beach.  Tricky, Kevin, tricky.  Dario did not bite on the bait and continued to be blissfully unaware of “feeling” contact, Sarah Fisher’s sidepod evidence to the contrary.  I can only imagine Dario watching every video of the wreck and having a big grin spread over his face as he realized that no evidence existed that proved he punted Newgarden.  Plausible deniability, baby.

5.  Robin Miller was a ghost in the broadcast, which seemed to please some on Twitter.  I missed seeing what new way he could come up with to totally screw up the grid run.  I was hoping NBC Sports would do a hologram like they had of Tupac at the Coachella Festival.  A digital Robin Miller might not be so out of breath during his interviews.  If you can’t do a digital Miller, then at least give him a Segway.

6.  NBC sports, here’s my WO on your broadcast:  just because you have a great segment in the can doesn’t mean you cut away from the race to show it.  How the cam locks on the nose and tail assemblies work is cool information.  I like it.  But how about a side-by-side?

7.  Turbo wars!  You can expect the following press release from Roger Penske:

Since the turbo change resulted in an equalizing of the Chevy and Honda motors, it is COMPLETELY UNFAIR.  Fairness only exists when the equipment used by Penske Racing is superior.  HOW CAN YOU PEOPLE NOT SEE THAT? 

8.  Will Power is an absolute beast.  In all seriousness, he is in a class of one.  Same car, same aero, same motor, different result.

9.  And how about the other racing?  Takuma Sato showed that he really can drive.  What a dive bomb in turn 1 at the end of the race.  How about Ed Carpenter’s day?  His late spin, assisted by Ana Beatriz, kept him out of a possible top ten finish.  His improvement on road/street courses is vital to the success of his program.  It should be noted that this very fast circuit is probably better suited to his emerging road/street course skills than slower venues.  In any case, a nice day for Ed and Fuzzy’s Premium Vodka.  As much as I rag on Dario Franchitti for his it’s-not-my-fault responses to contact initiated by him, he really can drive a race car.  After spinning and being airborne, he steers it back to fifth place.

10.  Twitter responses were interesting today.  It seems that people are made uncomfortable by commercials showing people who have lost limbs, required surgery, or have become incapacitated because of smoking.  I think that’s the idea.  And since they pay for the commercial time no one else wants to buy, I think we will see more of them.  People also seem slightly entertained by the Honda commercial featuring the “Hoodie Ninja” song by MC Chris.  People, have you ever listened to the lyrics of this song?  I’m surprised that Honda uses a song that refers to…well, refers to so many things that probably don’t need to be in a commercial for Honda.[1] You REALLY need to check out the footnote to listen to the song and read the lyrics.

Another set of worthless opinions offered for your perusal.  Don’t forget to check out the “Indy Tenderloin Tour” post coming up later this week.  A good breaded tenderloin is never worthless.

____________________

1.  Entertain yourself with this link that has the music and lyrics to “Hoodie Ninja” bu MC Chris. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z8aMumvh9eI

Posted in 10 Worthless Opinions, Humor, Opinions, Uncategorized and tagged , ,
24 Apr 2012
2 Comments

Indy Tenderloin Tour – Plump’s Last Shot

(First in a series of five appearing every Tuesday through May 22, 2012.)

Any food tour needs to include things iconic in nature.  Other than the Indy 500, what else is synonymous with Indiana?  You got it – high school basketball.  And what basketball movie is most connected with Indiana?  No, it’s not Blue Chips.  What’s wrong with you?  It’s Hoosiers.  Filmed on location in Indiana,[1] the fictional Hickory Huskers were inspired by the small school Milan Indians of 1954 [2].  The player who took the last shot to beat Muncie Central that day was Hoosier hero Bobby Plump.[3]  Bobby, who still advocates a return to a single-class basketball tournament in Indiana, is the owner of Plump’s Last Shot in Broad Ripple, an Indy neighborhood near Butler University.  And a bar with that kind of pedigree MUST serve a breaded tenderloin sandwich.  They call it The Hoosier Tenderloin.

We rolled in on a Sunday at noon.  Plump’s radiates…something.  And that’s not a knock.  It has a hippie/hiker/neighborhood vibe.  The location is an old house adjacent to the Monon Trail [4] and off the main drag.  It’s dog friendly with a great outdoor seating area.  Our friendly bartender Robin offered up menus and beer specials.  We ordered two breaded beauties and watched ESPN while we waited.

Here’s what arrived.

Look good, huh?  The sandwiches were HOT.  As we decided our plan of attack, we heard a serious pounding coming from the kitchen.  My son and I exchanged knowing glances.  It was Fred, the cook, pounding out pork loin for the sandwiches of the people who had just ordered.  I believe that’s called “fresh.”  Zach chose to cut his tenderloin in half and double it.  I sliced the overhang off and dipped it in mayo until the sandwich was small enough to hold.  It was great.

When Fred emerged from the kitchen, he told us that Plump’s cuts, trims, and pounds its tenderloins daily.  Nothing frozen here.  It’s coated in buttermilk and dredged through panko bread crumbs, flour, and spices.  The panko gave it a really crisp texture that held up for the half-hour it took to eat it.  With pickles, onions, and mayo, it was an absolute game winner.  My rating: it’s a checkered flag.

Ratings:
Checkered Flag: It’s a winner.  Picture should be on the Pork-Warner Trophy.
Green Flag: It’s a go.  Solid competitor with a chance to be a winner.
Yellow Flag:  Warning.  Something is not copacetic.
Black Flag:  Get this pig off the track.

___________________

1.  Here’s the link to the gym that was the home of the Hickory Huskers in the movie.  It’s in Knightstown, Indiana, just a short hop on US 40 or I-70 east of Indy.  When I was in high school, we would occasionally sneak in and play ball on a weekend.  The gym was no longer used for competition.  We would crawl through the window of the old Wilkinson High School gym to do the same thing.  Good times.
http://www.thehoosiergym.com/

2.  This is the true story of Bobby Plump and Milan. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1954_Milan_High_School_basketball_team

3.  Bobby Plump is truly iconic.  Here’s his Wikipedia page.  The links to the USA Today and The NY Times articles are worth the click.  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bobby_Plump

4.  The father coaching the team in Hoosiers tells Gene Hackman: “Fact is, mister, you start screwin’ up this team, I’ll personally hide-strap your ass  to a pine rail and send you up the Monon Line!”  We really do talk like that in Indiana.  The Monon Trail is a hiking/biking trail in the Indy area that was called the Monon Line when it was still a railroad.  Pretty cool.  Here’s a link. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monon_Trail

Posted in Indy Tenderloin Tour and tagged ,

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